How Does Depression Affect Relationships?

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Depression is a complicated illness that affects people in a number of ways. It not only affects the person suffering from it but those around them as well. Depression can affect anyone, including you and your loved ones.


According to NIMH, about 18 million people in the U.S. experience depression each year. This means that almost everyone knows someone who has struggled with depression at some point in their lives. Depression, unlike some other illnesses, isn’t always easy to recognize.

Depression can be tricky to spot in someone you love. For example, if you notice that they are often cranky, lost in thought, or can’t get out of bed for a week or more, there’s a good chance they need quick and professional help.


Even if other family members are unaware of a loved one’s depression, their symptoms might still have an influence. Depression among parents, for example, can have a particularly negative impact on children.


Subtle Signs of Depression


Depression can affect your life in many different ways. It’s important to be able to recognize its signs and symptoms so you can get the help you need. Here are some of the most common subtle signs of depression:


  • Staying in bed all day
  • Never cleaning their room
  • Frequently skipping meals
  • Cancelling plans

Identifying and misreading the symptoms of mental illness is one of the hardest aspects of caring for someone who has a mental illness.


Friends may wonder why you are suddenly avoiding them. Your spouse may become irritated if you don’t do your fair share around the house. You may irritate your children by not having the energy to play with them.


Frequently called an invisible illness, depression conceals itself from others. It is hard for loved ones to tell what you are going through. The pain of depression is all too real and draining, and is as real as other physical ailments. People are not usually aware of the wide range of symptoms that can accompany depression.


If you’re experiencing depression symptoms such as guilt and shame, they can make it more difficult to seek the help that you need. That’s because these symptoms can make you feel like you’re disappointing the people who care about you.


Caretaker Burdens


Family members may also feel guilty because of their loved one’s depression. Because they frequently act as caregivers, friends and family often believe something is their fault.


In other circumstances, family members may be concerned that they played a role in the depression’s onset. Depression is caused by factors including your genetics, biology, and environment; so while there may be things family members can do to help, they are not solely responsible for causing or correcting the problem.


Loved ones of individuals with severe depression experience similar burdens, according to a recently published study.


Health professionals frequently ignore the family members of depressed people, even though research has found that these family members are more likely to get sick themselves. Some of the effects they experience include:


  • Psychological distress
  • Physical and emotional burnout
  • Depression
  • Exhaustion

Family members generally feel dread, anxiety, powerlessness, and a variety of painful emotions. Studies have found that hostility, criticism, and even well-intentioned assistance can worsen depressive symptoms. Having a depressed family member can be a very stressful and emotional time for everyone involved. It is important to make sure that you are supporting them in a healthy way while setting boundaries.


Depression and itImpact on Family Life


When you’re depressed, tasks are hard, and you have less energy and motivation to do things. This obviously has an impact on other members of the household. 


Among the effects are:


  • Other members of your family may try to assist you by taking over responsibilities that you are struggling with.
  • Parents may assign chores to their children when they are unable to complete them.
  • Some tasks may simply go uncompleted, resulting in increased stress and dysfunction.

Members of your family may not fully comprehend what you are going through in some cases. While they may notice the effects of your symptoms, they may still struggle to understand what is causing them.


When you and your family members are irritable, it can lead to disagreements that can exacerbate household conflicts and misunderstandings.


If family members believe they are doing too much, they may become resentful. In other cases, they may feel guilty for not doing enough to assist.


Disruptions in Relationships


Depression symptoms can be difficult to interpret at times. Even people who suffer from depression frequently claim that they do not feel depressed. But that doesn’t mean their symptoms aren’t affecting their relationships.


Symptoms such as fatigue, irritability, and social withdrawal are common misdiagnoses. Difficulties recognizing depressive symptoms can also lead to relationship conflicts.

Your partner, for example, may interpret your social withdrawal as carelessness or a lack of interest. Others may interpret irritability and depression as directed specifically at them.


Often, depressed people will:


  • Sleep way more often than usual
  • Not sleep enough
  • Have an inability to concentrate
  • Be a lot less energetic
  • No longer enjoy things they once loved

This not only harms their relationships, but it also isolates the depressed person. People may pull away from the person since they don’t comprehend what’s producing the behaviors they’re seeing.